Discipline Is Choosing Between What You Want Now and What You Want Most
“Discipline is choosing between what you want now and what you want most.” These powerful words, often attributed to Abraham Lincoln, cut straight to the heart of personal development and long-term success. Whether you’re trying to lose weight, build a business, improve a relationship, or grow spiritually, the real battle is almost always internal. It’s a moment-to-moment choice between instant gratification and your ultimate goals. This quote doesn’t just define discipline — it reveals its soul.
Let’s break down what this really means, how it applies to everyday life, and how you can build a strong foundation of discipline to achieve your biggest dreams.
Understanding the Quote
At first glance, the quote presents a simple concept: there’s a difference between temporary pleasure and lasting achievement. The former is what tempts you in the moment — the dessert when you’re on a diet, the extra hour of sleep when you need to work, the scrolling through social media when you’ve got a paper to finish. The latter is what you’ve declared you really want — health, wealth, love, wisdom, success.
Lincoln’s quote forces us to reflect: Are we really committed to what we say we want?
If we consistently give in to what we want now, we sabotage what we want most. Discipline, then, is the bridge between goals and accomplishment. It is the quiet force that helps you say no to fleeting impulses so you can say yes to long-term fulfillment.
The Psychology Behind the Struggle
Human beings are wired for immediate gratification. From birth, we are rewarded quickly — a baby cries, and someone comforts it. This mechanism, while essential early in life, can become problematic as we grow older and face complex choices.
Psychologists refer to this as the “pleasure principle” — our tendency to seek pleasure and avoid pain. But life success often involves delaying pleasure, facing discomfort, and staying the course when things aren’t fun.
This is where self-regulation and executive function come into play. These are the mental skills that help us plan, focus attention, remember instructions, and juggle multiple tasks. Strong executive function helps you override short-term temptations in favor of long-term rewards.
Real-Life Applications
1. Health and Fitness
Perhaps the clearest example of Lincoln’s quote is in the world of health. Millions of people set goals to eat better, exercise, and live longer. But when faced with a donut versus a salad, the battle becomes real. You want the donut now, but what you really want most is a healthy, energetic body.
Discipline steps in and says: “I see what you want right now, but I’m protecting what you want most.”
The gym, the early morning run, the skipped dessert — they all seem like sacrifices, but they’re really investments.
2. Financial Goals
Want to save for a house, pay off debt, or build wealth? That means resisting the urge to buy things just because they feel good in the moment. Impulse spending is the enemy of long-term wealth.
Choosing financial discipline means creating a budget, sticking to it, and remembering that your future comfort is worth more than today’s convenience.
3. Career and Education
Whether you’re studying for a degree or building a business, the path is long and often frustrating. You’ll face moments where rest seems more appealing than hustle. Procrastination will whisper, “Just watch one episode,” but your dreams will whisper louder — if you let them.
Every moment you resist distraction and focus on your work, you’re honoring what you want most.
4. Relationships
Even in love and friendship, discipline matters. It takes discipline to communicate calmly during an argument, to stay faithful during temptation, or to show up for someone when it’s inconvenient.
Want a strong relationship? Then choose actions that align with that goal, not just temporary emotions.
How to Build This Kind of Discipline
So how do you strengthen your ability to choose what you want most over what you want now?
1. Clarify Your “Most”
You can’t make the right choice if you’re unclear about what you really want most. Take time to identify your highest priorities:
- Is it to become financially free?
- To be in great physical shape?
- To become a published author?
- To travel the world?
Write these goals down. Make them visible. When you’re tempted by momentary pleasure, you can literally see what you’re saying no to if you choose now over most.
2. Use Visualization
Elite athletes, entrepreneurs, and performers use visualization to stay on track. See yourself achieving your biggest goal. Imagine how it feels. Picture the rewards. This mental practice strengthens your emotional connection to the future and helps you override present urges.
3. Delay, Don’t Deny
Tell yourself: “I can have this later, just not now.” Often, just a short pause gives your rational brain time to kick in. You might find the urge passes. That’s discipline in motion.
4. Create Systems, Not Willpower
Discipline is often mistaken for sheer willpower. But willpower is a limited resource. Systems, however, make good behavior automatic. Want to write a book? Block out writing time each morning. Want to eat better? Meal prep ahead of time so the decision is already made. Want to save money? Automate your savings.
Set up your life to make the right decision the easy decision.
5. Forgive Yourself
Discipline doesn’t mean perfection. You will slip. What matters is how you respond. Don’t use one failure as an excuse to give up. Learn, forgive yourself, and recommit to what you want most.
The Rewards of Choosing What You Want Most
Let’s be honest: Discipline feels hard. It often feels lonely. And in a world that glorifies ease and comfort, it can even make you feel out of place.
But here’s the truth: The rewards of discipline are unmatched.
When you live aligned with your deepest values, something magical happens:
- You gain self-respect.
- You trust yourself.
- You start to feel powerful, because you’re no longer a slave to momentary feelings.
- You begin to achieve things others only dream of.
People around you will wonder how you’re doing it. But the secret will always be simple: you’re choosing what you want most.
Final Thoughts
Abraham Lincoln is often celebrated for his wisdom, resilience, and moral clarity. Whether or not this exact quote originated with him, it reflects the kind of discipline that defined his leadership. He lived through hardship, loss, and war — yet remained focused on what mattered most: the unity and freedom of a nation.
We may not face the same challenges, but we each have a dream worth fighting for. Every day, every moment, you are given a choice:
- Eat the junk food or stick to your plan.
- Watch TV or build your future.
- Spend now or invest wisely.
- React in anger or respond in love.
Discipline is not a punishment — it’s protection. It shields your future from the erosion of your impulses.
So the next time you’re tempted, ask yourself: What do I want most?
And let that answer guide you home.